Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Finding peace in the midst of chaos

Our 4 year old son, Isaac was asked to draw a picture to express his thoughts towards everything that took place the night we were detained. Sol and I remember watching how quickly his careful and detailed drawing suddenly became crazy red scribbles all over the paper.
He tried to make sense of everything...but it was all chaos to him.

I never fail to compliment my children's artwork, but this time I had nothing to say.  My heart sank as I felt the frustration and confusion that our 4 year old son and the rest of our children were trying so hard to define.

As the days passed by and our children began to display more anger and insecurities, it became harder to maintain the positive outlook and hold on to the peace that God had given us.
It was heart breaking enough to say our good-byes and squeeze all the love we could into our 4 adopted children let alone leave them to deal with all the abuse and pain they had experienced.  We were left to believe that God would bring healing and comfort to each one during our time apart.

18 hours later when our plane finally landed at the LAX airport, Ethan and Isaac finally breathed a sigh of relief.  All they could think of was their buddies, legoes and the security of being in their own home.  We welcomed ourselves home, stepped off the airplane and trekked down to the baggage claim.  Unfortunately, the US Immigration stopped us and we were taken to a small seated area to wait.  We were EXHAUSTED and not ready to be questioned again.

Even though there wasn't a problem with our passports, Sol was bullied and mistreated by a few of the immigration officers. Halfway through, I closed my eyes as it hurt too much to watch my husband, a US citizen himself, be ill treated by US immigration officers.  Once again, we were ALL traumatized and fearful of what they were going to do with us.  Ethan and Isaac were shaking with fear and worried that their parents would be taken away... again.  Sol felt betrayed.  Betrayed by our own people that we thought would be the ones to welcome us home.  I felt helpless because this time I couldn't fight for my husband.  Instead, I had to sit there quietly at the mercy of the other officers. We tried to explain to them that the Ghana Police never placed any charges on us and the media had it all wrong...we were never arrested at the airport in Accra. 

With a couple cuts and bruises on Sol's leg, 2 traumatized children and all of our luggage, we were finally released to go. I don't know how we made it home... but we did... and when we finally entered into our home, we were warmly welcomed with flowers and a welcome home banner from friends and family.  There was nothing more comforting and assuring than to know how much we were loved and supported. 
In that moment... I was reminded again that God's presence had not left us.
He was still there.
Nothing made sense that night....I put my head to my pillow and pleaded with God to shower His healing on our family and bring an end to this chaos. 
We had experienced enough.

The next morning, God gave me comfort through Psalm 27 and reminded me that He is the One who is fighting this battle for us. 
I'll admit, finding peace and remaining in His peace is very difficult these days...
but every morning we wake up, God never fails to show up and remind us that He is still in control and we are on the right path. 

Psalm 27 
"The Lord is my light and my salvation
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall. 
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.
One thing I ask from the Lord,
this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
and to seek him in his temple.
 For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
and set me high upon a rock. 

 I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living. 
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord."

20 comments:

  1. I am so sorry for all the troubles you and your family have endured. I pray you all find comfort in being home and and courage and strength to keep the fight for your 4 children that are still in Ghana. Many hugs from BC, Canada.

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  2. Christine, I'm in tears hearing all that your sweet family has gone through. I will be praying and please, please let me know if there is anything we can help with. I just can't imagine. Lord give you peace and bring healing.

    Randee

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  3. Our hearts ache again and again hearing what you all had to go through. Continue to pray for His utmost protection over you all and your family will get re-united with no more chaos or unforeseen challenges. Jesus is Lord over all things, and He will cause all things to work together for good to those who love Him - this is our prayer.

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  4. Satan does not want this battle won by the Lord, that is abundantly clear! Lifting up your entire family right now!

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  5. Praying blessings GALORE on your precious family!

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  6. Praying for your family, I know this is not over until those beautiful children come home! I also have a 4 year old boy. I can't imagine the heartache you must have felt when you saw his drawing. I'm so sorry that US customs detained you even further from returning home to safety. I'm having my church pray for your family, the church and a few families are donating to your adoption fund. I was April Diaz's roommate in college, at Judson for a year. Blessings to you, from Iowa!

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  7. Im sorry you had trouble with rude immigration officers. I must say that we've had two adoptions on two different occasions going through immigration in two different airports. I found them to be extremely rude and harsh each time. I found them so rude and ignorant to immigrants coming in that didn't speak much English that I was embarrassed for us as a nation. After all, where did the "melting pot" mentality go? I realize this was the least of the difficulties you've had to endure (and I'm so sorry), but am disgusted to think that adoptive families have such a "welcome home" from our great country.

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    1. Just imagine how those who are not Americans get treated :-(

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  8. Continually praying for your precious family...I can't even begin to fathom all you had to endure and having to endure. Praying for your babes in Ghana..praying for your babes home with you...praying for peace and healing...praying your sweet one's home!

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  9. I'm so sorry for all you have had to endure! I'm praying that God will go before you in all things and bring your children home to you soon. May he surround you with his peace and love.

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  10. I'm so sorry for ALL you have endured thus far. But I know and I know beauty will rise from the ashes simply coz that's the story of the cross. Keep your focus on Him and Him alone. Praying for peace, healing and comfort that only He can give.

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  11. My heart breaks for your family. I am so sorry that in our country you were mistreated! It is a reminder that, Thank God, this is not our home! We know that this suffering on earth leads to life...just like labor pains.

    Praying! Rest, peace, reunion,joy, and HIS goodness poured out over you. That is what I'm praying.

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  12. I was at an event tonight where there were a bunch of adoptive moms and we mentioned that we didn't know what had come of y'all - so sad to come and hear this story. When you adopt, you dance with the devil. Praying that your dance ends SOON.

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  13. Cuts and bruises? Where from?!! I can't believe this! I am so very sorry for you guys. I can't believe officials from YOUR home country treat people like that based on what media says! Will continue to pray for you guys. God bless you and keep you all safe, always.

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  14. Oh my. my heart just breaks for you. I am so sorry for the way you have been treated...I am appalled at how you were treated by our own government!! especially in front of your children. Praying for peace and healing for you and your children's hearts. those here and in Ghana. Much love from Va.

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  15. I'm sorry for your experience. God will make you stronger through all this huge trial. Praying you get your 4 children home quickly from Ghana. (We've been to Ghana several times and love that country!)
    Blessings and love from BC, Canada.

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  16. I sooo wish that you didn't have to worry about the hurts that have happened to you all. PRAYING for your family!! For HEALING FROM THE ONLY TRUE SOURCE!!! PRAYING for your 4 babes overseas to know that you love them without question! PRAYING for your babes at home to experience a deep sense of healing with you. Praying for you and your husband to experience true healing as well. UPSET that the immigration is soooo messed up. I don't even want to go there (we have had some huge issues with them as well!!).

    PRAYING for you all lifting you to the Father- the lover of your family, the ONE who created you each to be together as a family!!! PRAYING HIS comfort and peace to once again be your shield!!!

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  17. My heart aches for your sufferings. Though 4 adoptions and living overseas I have seen many times how the enemy hates us, and especially hates the orphans of the world. As you well know, we do not fight against flesh and blood but against the spiritual powers of wickedness - no matter what side of the ocean you're on.

    Rest in the knowledge that the battle belongs to the Lord. May he open your eyes to see the army of heaven on your side, fighting for you.

    Sarah

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  18. Praying that you can rest and be still in the LORD; that you will be healed and encouraged. We serve a faithful and mighty God! We will be praying especially for the protection of your kids in Ghana as well.

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