Thursday, April 11, 2013

Looking back... perspective

It's just been one of those weeks. A week where I was desperate for perspective.  I felt like I was drowning... drowning in a sea of tantrums.  Our kids seemed triggered by even the smallest things and yet very significant.  I would be happy if we had 3 meltdowns in one day instead of after another.   Well intentioned. loving, supportive friends just didn't seem to understand that feeding our children, hugging our children and showing them extra, unnecessary attention just throws them back a few steps... which means more attachment work for Sol and I.  It's discouraging as we watch our children regress when another friend/stranger tries to show them care.
They become confused, insecure and detached again...hence the tantrums.
 In their traumatized, hurting minds, anyone that feeds or hugs them is their caregiver. 
We can't expect our kids to understand.
In the midst of so many battles, it can be so frustrating that it's easy to forget....
forget why and how we got here...only 7 months ago.
I needed to be reminded again....
I read old blog posts, looked at pictures from our first trip to Ghana and then came across this video that I had put together while we were waiting for our children to come home.
I was reminded.
Reminded of how much I love my kids.
Reminded of this incredible gift that I've been given of being their mother... forever.


  1. This blog is so fantastic and inspiring! It has so much great information about the adoption process! Thanks for sharing your story!

  2. Thanks for sharing, and my wife and I have been thinking about adoption for the last year or so. And finally we're getting ready to start the adoption application. So we'll see how the next couple of months go for us.